Course work.I woke up facing stars but don’t have any idea how I ended up here , is this a dream? If it is I want to wake up.
It’s about 11:50 pm on a dark misty night , but how did I get here? How did I break from the chains that held me in my room for so long? There’s no point of thinking.
As I woke up I found myself on a green bench by the traffic light yonder I see the food shop that had been closed down since the last time I had been free , has it re-opened or am I seeing things in this mist that seems almost cloud like? It doesn’t matter freedom at last , I can see everything once again. I breathe and take in the pure air that awakens me from my everlasting slumber , then I get up from the bench and walk to the edge of the pavement , and in front of me across the road is the tower block I once called mine , it was so tall It blocked the whole moon at night time and it glowed like a light tower due to the light of the moon leaving a shadow of the tower covering most of the landscape around it. After I had reminisced about the tower that had blackened the landscape I headed east in the light of the lampposts that had covered the side of the pavement. As I’m walking I hear the sirens of justice further down the street , as the sound draws closer like the sun rising from its slumber I see the blue flashing lights of justice rising from the hill coming In my direction, are they coming for me? If so why? I have to get away but it’s futile to run, justice always finds you. I stand still in the night under the lamppost waiting for the blue lights of justice to take me, but as walk into the street ready to surrender the blue lights as quick as lightning fly past me leaving the black smoke roaming the streets. I continue east and end up at the steep hill of nightmares, the moon reflected off one side of the hill leaving the other side covered in the darkness of the shadows. As I stood looking up at the hill of nightmares I hear screams from the other side of the hill, not screams of fear but the screams of the dead that haunt the hill looking for revenge. I run away through the abandoned forest, which was once the park where everyone went to, I run to get away from the screams but they follow me though the darkness of the forest. As I run I feel my knees weakening but I carry on running towards the light of the lamppost at the second exit of the Forrest, but at last my legs take me and I fall face first into the dirt that took up the Forrest. As I doze off back to my slumber. 10 am I wake, but not where I slept, I wake in my room where I’m trapped by the chains that rattle on my ankles. I get up and touch the bars that keep me imprisoned in this room, was that night just a dream? It doesn’t matter anyways because all I can see now are white walls, that block my path to freedom.

November 2, 2015 at 5:50 pm
I think your presentation of time here allows for the task to be completed well; your character comparing past and present. It might make more sense to separate your comparisons via paragraphs.
What about those paragraphs? Where should they be? Why?
You should also spend some time editing your sentence lengths.
I would also be wary of using phrases such as: ‘After I had reminisced about the tower that had blackened the landscape I headed east in the light of the lampposts that had covered the side of the pavement.’ This gives too much information rather than using any symbols to suggest (and to help us infer) how your character might be reacting to their surroundings.